Carry His Torch, High and Proud

Colon cancer is a terrible, terrible thing. It preys on the healthy and tortures the weak. It severs families. It changes lives! When I was four years old, my life was forever altered when my daddy died from this horrible disease. Though I remember precious little about him, friends and family members who knew him have painted him, in my mind, as a modern-day Enoch- a man who walked with God no matter what the cost. Even when he reached the last steps of the final lap of his life, he carried his spiritual torch high and proud, a testimony of God's goodness.

"What a legacy he left behind," they would marvel.

"What big shoes to fill," I would think with panicked heart.

I am all grown up now, approaching 30s portal all too soon, but I often wonder if the spiritual torch that was handed down to me burns as brightly as it did from my father's unwavering hand. I accepted Christ as my Savior at a young age, and I have always been surrounded by godly role models. I know the Bible cover to cover. I go to church faithfully. I serve.

But life stings sometimes. It cripples, and even getting out of bed seems impossible, much less carrying around this heavy torch. "It is too much responsibility. Let someone else carry it." The devil, astute to my weakness, whispers unending lies. When life serves up so much heartache, I find myself wondering how Daddy managed. Did he struggle as I often do to stay grounded in the Word, to seek the Savior on a daily basis? Did he become encumbered with the cares of life, stooping beneath the weight of burdens too heavy to bear? How did he remain faithful to the Rose of Sharon when he was surrounded by thorns? These questions fester unanswered in my heart at times. It would be easy to allow bitterness to take root and to shake my fist at God for calling Daddy home when I needed him the most.

I am ashamed to admit that I have turned away from the LORD sometimes, foolishly deceiving myself that I can manage life better on my own. And what a pile of sin-sick carnage that turns out to be. And each time, as I cry out to God from the midst of the wreckage, I am amazed to see Him standing there with open arms, offering not only to take me back, but to walk along with me. And just like Daddy would have done, my Heavenly Father urges me to carry His torch, high and proud.
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About Me

Laura Guelfi
United States
I wear many hats: wife, mommy, real estate agent, bookkeeper, church pianist, writer. Whichever hat I wear today, may I honor Christ in every way!

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Inspired by Max Lucado's book, God's Story, Your Story.

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